Infinite

I've never really had an online diary before and I don't really know how this works. All I know is that this should help me get my thoughts and feelings out. That sounds sort of geeky, I know. I don't know who's reading this at the moment, all I know is that I feel better knowing that someone out there is. I need to know that someone is listening. 

It's important that you know that I'm in band. In fact, right now I'm currently in the middle of band camp. If you don't know what that is, it's a week where a high school marching band goes to stand under a hot sun on the football field and sweat their skin off. It's one of the few forms of torture that's consider legal nowadays.

On Sunday, I went to an amusement park. I'm not going to tell you where because I don't want anyone to know who I am. I need this to be anonymous. I'm not ashamed of anything I do or say, I just don't want anyone I know to maybe stumble upon this one day and figure out who I am just by process of elimination. 

At the park, I had an amazing last day before band camp. At around 10:00 at night, our driver needed to go home. And as my last hoorah before my summer was technically over, we begged the driver to let us ride one last roller coaster. And he let us. And so we did.

Words cannot describe how amazing that last thrill felt. I felt as though, in all forms of the word, I was infinite. I just recently read the book, The Perks of Being a Wallflower which would maybe explain my sudden urge to want to write a journal in the hope that someone is reading it. The main character could not have picked a better word in the English dictionary to explain how I felt Sunday night.

It was about 78 degrees or so. Maybe a bit colder. The cart that we were in was G6. Yes, that's right. "Fly like a G6". When I got in, I could feel all this adrenaline bursting through my veins. It was like a drug. I couldn't have smiled any bigger if someone put a banana in my mouth. I can still remember the rush I felt when the ride started and all I could think about was flying. And as we were climbing the top of that first drop, my brain started whizzing about like it does sometimes. I thought about my friends, my family, school, the past week, everything. And then as we started heading down, I thought of nothing. All I could think of, was the wind in my hair and how much fun I was having. The ride felt endless. The lights on the coaster, the screams, the moon, the city all around us. I was flying.

All of my memories of this past summer, will be from last week. Not only the amusement park, but the beach. The nights spent at the school. Roasting marshmallows. Watching the stars. Everything. It was a week that was perfect. Although there were some dramatic moments...the good memories made the bad ones seem not so important anymore. And in a way I wish every week could feel like that. 

I wish I could feel infinite every week.